We are an independent group whose connection to tango is based on the pure enjoyment of the experience of dancing and the social aspects of an open community.  The music, the friendships and the interconnection of everything that surrounds tango is what drives us. 

Our goal is to provide all things Tango with a splash of information on other dancing in the St. Louis area. We post Milongas, Practicas and Performances of anyone who wishes to list their event. St. Louis is a strong community that supports a wide variety of tango. We want  our community to continue to grow while maintaining respect for the origins of Argentine Tango and the people who take the risk of exploring this wonderful dance.  We encourage posting of all tango events in and around the St. Louis area.

We encourage comments and suggestions. Thank you for visiting our site.

Confessions of a Tango Dancer

by mj francis a tango dancer from the Midwest dedicated to continuing the Argentine Tango experience  

Simply put, I cannot explain it; maybe it will help if I share my experience. I am one who should know better.  My life has never been exciting, so why now? Head-over-heels? ...I don’t think so, but the feelings were very real. In her presence my heart would race. I had unexplained emotions that left me exhausted, excited and often confused. I am not sure how this happened. I had always been content in my world of rules and reliability. So why would I be willing to leave the safety of my world?

In reflection, it happened quietly, the unforeseen changes sneaking up on me one step at a time. She entered my world with out me noticing. Soon I could feel the connection, strong, intense and so incredibly real, but I resisted. The timing wasn’t right and I had no room for her in my nice, neat world. Besides it was well known that she had other lovers and she was forever cultivating new “connections”. That is not to say I wasn’t interested; I was very interested!  Her past was intriguing and colorful. I felt glimpses of her passion, it was intoxicating and I knew she could take me places that I had never been! But NO! I was not going to fall, she was not right for me. I did not have time nor the energy to be lead by another’s expectations. I don’t need, nor did I want her.

When we were first introduced she went unnoticed. I had no desires of pursuit.

As a matter of fact I ignored her. I ignored her and she smiled.

I never spoke her name; she only had kind words for me.

I would not embrace her, yet she always extended her hand to me.

Even when I began to sense her interest in me, I showed non-in her.  I would go days with out acknowledging her existence yet she remained faithful in her quest. I would often tell myself that she could never be interested in some as quiet and predictable as me. Her past was deep and powerful, I could never be a part of her history. However, when we were face-to-face, there was an undeniable, visceral connection.

I still resisted.

I decided her interest in me was selfishly motivated. I knew she had deep connections with someone else. I new her type, she could never be monogamous and she would never be able to survive in the everyday, mundane world in which I lived. Her presence was intimidating. She lived by her own set of rules that are unacceptable in my rigid, rule-driven life. What would people think? Her world was fantasy and passion, mine predictable and controlled. So, I kept my distance. I did not need the pain or the heartache.

Deep down I realized that she was so much more than I could every hope to be. Her beauty was undeniable, her appeal universal, and her passion was so intense it changed those who understood her. So I convinced myself again her interest in me was imagined. However, I decided to let her into my life in short controlled moments and outside of those moments I kept my distance.

I knew my efforts were weakening when, among friends, late at night over coffee and conversation and she was nowhere in sight, I felt her presence. Her passion slipped into my thoughts, and her timeless beauty found its way into my heart. Even as I felt I was losing control I fought the to prevent the inevitable.

I was not willing to spend my precious time trying to please her. I had my own commitments and obligations.  I had no time to surrender to her. This was because deep down I knew that her passion was too strong and would require so much more time and energy to satisfy her demands of me.  She would never be satisfied with my commitment; she would need more time, more energy I could never giver her enough! I was in continual conflict. Do I follow my heart or my head? Do I do what others expect or do I do what I want?   Enough thinking, it was time, time to take a chance time to make changes and try something new.

As predicted, she was waiting. She was not smug; she was confidant I would find her, eventually. So we spent time together, I needed to get to know her, where she came from, why she touched so many. At the same time, she really wasn’t interested in my past. My life before her had no meaning; her only concern was my commitment to her. Was it real? Could I make a difference?

Our time together was magical. We played hard and tested our limits. I opened myself to new feelings and she was with me each and every step. Even amidst the excitement of a new relationship it was a struggle for me. Being free and open did not come naturally to me.  I had to learn to leave my world and embrace a new one. It was easy for her, this was the only life she knew. As we continued, we needed more time and she was always waiting, waiting fro me to fall deeper and deeper in love, and I did! Again, she was more demanding than I ever could have imagined and I accepted her challenge. I found more time to spend with her and when we were apart, she danced in my thoughts. I did everything I could do meet her high expectations, despite my limitations set by a life of conservative actions and predictable decisions.  I finally listened to my heart and after endless hours of struggling to do the right thing, I did the best thing!

As we spent time together, I often reminded myself I would not be the only one in her embrace, but I could not help it! As foolish as it may sound, I could not resist. The risk was well worth the rewards. As I opened my heart to her world, the control of mine began to slip away. I knowingly left the comfortable and controlled and cautiously continued my relationship with her. I found myself relinquishing; reason for rendezvous, predictability for passion, and control for controversy.

I wanted her world for mine. AS you read my thought you may not understand, I’m not sure I do. I fell so hard, so fast, that reason was no longer part of my vocabulary.  I knew it, but I could not stop! I could sense the judgmental disapproval from people who weren’t involved, bit it did not matter. While I was in her arms no one else existed. My entire world was limited to the one that we created in that single moment we were together.  It was her world now, the world where I was the most important person to her. A world where I lead and she listened. This is what she wanted all along and I did not care, call it manipulation or seduction, I still didn’t care.

In the comfort of her arms, her past did not matter. In that wonderful moment when I held her tight against my racing heart, her connections to lovers across the globe ceased to exist.  Our connection was so strong, the connection I never wanted, the connection I will never forget!

As we all well know, nothing is what it seems and reality is forever tapping us on our shoulder.  I am no different and as I released her, space separated us and she slipped away. The heat rose form our bodies and vanished in the void between us. As I stared into her eyes, I saw the ghosts of her past and realized her need to reach for more willing souls and to invite them into her world. In the same moment, I felt the warmth of her heart in her need to please me and everyone she had ever touched.  In that moment when I allowed myself to go into her world with no bindings or restrictions she entered mine.

I think I understood. For her it was never about control. It was never about perfection it was about freedom, the Freedom to escape the trappings of our daily life and all of its responsibilities.  She understood to find that freedom one must make that commitment. Not to be the best but the willingness to be at your best. It was our willingness to take a chance that would allow one to find peace and passion in a dance! A dance that is never about the steps, it is about sharing, it’s about listening. Tango is about ones willingness to open your heart to the music, and the moment and that someone whom you wish to share a part of yourself.  

Argentine Tango was very patient in her pursuit of me. She understood my cautious nature in accepting her.  Most of all, she was gracious in how she gave herself to me and anyone willing to take the risk of leaving their comforts and embracing new challenges. Tango is a dance that is an extension each one of us who accepts her challenge. As we dance and share our experience we must understand that we get what we give and it is that giving nature that has allows Argentine Tango to find a passionate home in St. Louis.

We are special souls who invite Argentine Tango into our hearts and with that invitation comes responsibility and that responsibility should never be taken lightly.

Argentine Tango Offer a smile, continue to reach and share your experience.

Offer a smile, continue to reach and share your experience.

Argentine Tango is sharing. Sharing the Past. Sharing the Music. Most importantly, sharing a part of you!